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Attention: Post Whores IX - Whores have nine lives

 
Old Jan 30, 2018, 08:40 AM
  #766  
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Originally Posted by TeStUdO View Post
Turtledamus over here. Ha.
I think I mentioned it without saying it was her, but she was the girl that wouldn't shut up about her ex's 'vette, and I bet her **** that my car was more exciting than his limp dick midlife crisis mobile*, then toggled off the rev limiter and stomped it at like 20, and it fishtailed to 80 mph when I backed off. I knew that either my junk or her load was going to be in her pants that night I felt cheated by not getting in her butt the first night and after a couple weeks I texted her to see if she wanted to go through with the bet. Still kind of surprised she paid out.


Originally Posted by letsgetthisdone View Post
It's certainly not typical, but I'm also not sure I'd call it rare. Of the 30 or so I've been with, 5 fell into the "horrible" category.
I'd say the % is at least that high. Horrible for me mostly means she just lay there like a dead fish. The one above was basically that, but she also wouldn't spread her knees when we were doing doggy style and her hips are higher than mine, so I had to get up on one knee and stretch...which aggravated a couple old injuries.


Originally Posted by DonHugo View Post
*****, what's happening?

So, I am totally tired of my jerb, I need a new way to make money. I want to do something along the lines of make something to sell and make a million dollars. Something better that a pet rock or a Jump to Conclusions Mat.
Am I the only one who really wanted to try Jump to Conclusions? I'm braining on a Shark Tank idea, since the GF introduced me to the show, and I am trying to tailor it to Mr. Wonderful or whatever the bald guy's name is. I have come up with and discarded several, but maybe we can collaborate. Everything is more fun with a partner.


*I don't actually have anything against 'vettes, but most of the guys I know who drive them are either that stereotype or kids whose parents bought them the car or are track guys with cages.
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 08:42 AM
  #767  
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Originally Posted by DonHugo View Post
*****, what's happening?

So, I am totally tired of my jerb, I need a new way to make money.
Are you allergic to lubes and lotions ??
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 08:52 AM
  #768  
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I'd rather not have to use my body to make extra money, someone may be disappointed
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 10:19 AM
  #769  
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Originally Posted by DonHugo View Post
Yesterday, we had such high absenteeism that I was busted down 5 grades and made to sit at the reception window. That is an unbelievably horrible assignment. I was made a high level expert to get away from that window and I made sure that I was more valuable at another position just to get away from that job. .
I love when that happens to me. I make my coworkers call me the 6 figure secretary or I do not allow them to badge in the office. I manually over ride the swipe access and make them buzz the Aiphone so they can say the password in order to be let in.

Originally Posted by letsgetthisdone View Post
Of the 30 or so I've been with, 5 fell into the "horrible" category.
Yeah, that's almost 20 percent. Not great luck.
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 01:03 PM
  #770  
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I'd agree with 20% being bad - either dead fish or just... bad.

The rest I'd split between actually good and entirely forgettable.
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 01:27 PM
  #771  
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I think that Cardi B has successfully become the trashiest person on the planet. She really is a walking piece of human garbage. Her catch phrase is "a hoe never gets cold".
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 01:55 PM
  #772  
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Originally Posted by DonHugo View Post
Funny that my buddy who wapce set up with the psycho told me that she was horrible in the sack. Like a dry leather pouch, no matter what was done.


woof. That's the worst. Even better when they try to start talking ****. Uh, no *****. Your ****** just sucks.

Originally Posted by WestSideBilly View Post
I'd agree with 20% being bad - either dead fish or just... bad.

The rest I'd split between actually good and entirely forgettable.
Agree on both points Definitely at least half were nothing special/forgettable. And from there its pretty exponential upward slope to the top 2-3 that were actually amazing..
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 01:56 PM
  #773  
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Originally Posted by NFSEvolutionGSR View Post
I think that Cardi B has successfully become the trashiest person on the planet. She really is a walking piece of human garbage. Her catch phrase is "a hoe never gets cold".
Would not smash.
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 03:51 PM
  #774  
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Originally Posted by letsgetthisdone View Post
Would not smash.
I would smash...in the face with a lamp.
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Old Jan 30, 2018, 04:34 PM
  #775  
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I've certainly done worse from a looks standpoint


Is she basically a hip hop version of Miley Cyrus? Being trashy for the sake of being trashy?
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Old Jan 31, 2018, 06:42 AM
  #776  
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Originally Posted by WestSideBilly View Post
Is she basically a hip hop version of Miley Cyrus? Being trashy for the sake of being trashy?
Cardi B acts like the quintessential hood rat.

Miley is a different kind of trashy, but she appears to have cleaned up her act a lot.
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Old Jan 31, 2018, 09:00 AM
  #777  
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Originally Posted by letsgetthisdone View Post
woof. That's the worst. Even better when they try to start talking ****. Uh, no *****. Your ****** just sucks.
Like what girls say about guys, I've found that the ones that brag the most are usually the worst in the sack. Maybe because they've ****ed a lot of guys they think it means they are good at it? Maybe guys are telling them they are good as a joke and they believed it? Also, ones that brag about having done extreme stuff usually are lying; the ones that just kind of "um maybe" when it comes up are the ones that actually do it. Like if a girl got really drunk and rimmed a guy for 3 seconds one time she will spend the next 20 years claiming she is a dirty girl who loves eating ***. I have been disappointed by this type of girl several times before I learned the signs.

I've been with a couple really dry girls, and it isn't that bad. You just work it in anyways. Makes it almost feel like a butt, with lots of stiction. I wouldn't want it every day, but it can be fun. Or just spit in it. What I can't handle is stink. If her pants come down and an odor fills the room, I won't go in even with a condom. There are exceptions if like it's a girl I've been with before and I know she just got done working out so it's going to be musty, but if it smells like rotten fish it's getting thrown back.

Originally Posted by letsgetthisdone View Post
Agree on both points Definitely at least half were nothing special/forgettable. And from there its pretty exponential upward slope to the top 2-3 that were actually amazing..
It isn't that hard for a girl to be decent, just move a little bit and maybe make some squeaky noises. That's it. I can find angles that work for most ****ies, if the girl is being proactive at all. I've found the worst offenders to be girls that are really tight. Like they think that is all it takes, so they don't need to put in any effort. Naw, if I just want tight, I'm hitting your ***. Move around a little if I'm being nice and putting it in the front-butt. Girls that I can get four fingers in without any prep, they are usually going to work hard and know what to do to make it work. Not all of them, but most. The Asian girl from the car story, hers was huge but she was also terrible. Except her butt. Her butt was nice, but bruised me up more than expected considering how big it was.

BJs for me are what's hard to find with any quality. I can name 2 that were really good (current is one, part of why I'm putting up with her, other was the 24 year old coke head) and the rest were at best ok. Lots were bad enough that I made them stop. Without giving details you guys don't want, most girls mouths I think just don't jive right with my anatomy. Give me a girl with a jaw like a Neanderthal.
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Old Jan 31, 2018, 09:16 AM
  #778  
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I can't wait for Cali's memoirs to be published
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Old Jan 31, 2018, 11:43 AM
  #779  
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Too late. I've already forgotten most of the good stuff, from when I was young and still in my experimental stage. Now it's mostly just spurts of idiocy every 6 months or so when I get horny.
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Old Jan 31, 2018, 12:21 PM
  #780  
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Originally Posted by CaliMR View Post
What I can't handle is stink. If her pants come down and an odor fills the room, I won't go in even with a condom.
This. Stink means infection, and do not want.
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